MAFS: Second Chances-Episode 9: Meet The Parents

Happy Friday, good people!  Let’s get right into it. The breakups are definitely getting harder to watch, especially since I have my choices of people who I want both David and Vanessa to end up with, and who I think would be the best fit for them.  Shrug. Nevertheless, someone’s gotta go.

David shows up at Salem’s door. How many of y’all knew that was going to happen? At least I did. Remember I said they would be the best of friends-- matching T-shirts, and maybe ankle bracelets. But husband and wife? I couldn’t see it. There was no romantic vibe and even less of an intimacy between them.  What I do know, is that when I go to Atlanta, I need Salem to beat my face, honey because her make-up was always on point! 

Vanessa chooses to stop dating Zach and I’m not upset about it. I didn’t think he was someone she could ultimately build with. Great Value Michael Ealy is a sweetheart, but I don’t think they had enough of a romantic and baseline chemistry to work in the long term.

It’s down to 3, and I’M overwhelmed, so I know David and Vanessa must be.

So with those that remain, the gag is, that they do a group date with David and Vanessa’s moms, and then the roles are reversed where they themselves, end up in the hot seat, having to do individual dates with the daters families.

Us:

Dave and the girls, Isabella, Tara and Melika are up first.

Melika is late.

*Crickets*

Ok girl, whatever.

I can tell that David is super nervous, and I felt like he was very close to peeing his pants. Like,  super close.  Breathe, doll.  

Ms. Edie takes the girls aside one by one to have individual conversations about how they feel about her son, and if they’re ready for a serious relationship. She talks with each of the girls, and tries to get a feel for their intentions. Ultimately, she tells Dave that she thinks Tara is the best choice. Yes, ma!! #TeamTara. I am all for this David and Tara match up, not only because they have history, because she seems less likely to take advantage of his kindness.

Vanessa’s group date with Shannon, Myles and Dre, starts off pretty awkward. Shannon and Myles brought her mom gifts, and Dre didn’t bring her anything, except more hugs. I mean, not everything has to be material, but meeting the parents is big deal. Maybe flowers next time?

So while packing boxes for of food for the less fortunate, Ms. Chandra starts to get to know the guys, what they do for a living and a little more about who they are as people.

Myles: I work in the medical marijuana field.

Ms. Chandra:

Overall, the date go well and I think she got to learn more about who was best for Vanessa. I like the fact that Andre chose to ask her a question about marriage and one of the most important pieces of it. When mama said “communication,” I almost lost my mind. Great answer! While Ms. Chandra didn’t say who she would choose, she did say that she’s surprised that someone like Shannon had made it this far considering his personality is so different from Vanessa’s.

When Vanessa and David meet with Dr. Pepper, she explains to them that the next phase of dating will be meeting each dater’s family, choosing two of them to move in with for a week each, and then eliminating one as well.  

 Y’all. This is when I would have had to tap myself out. I can’t even decide what I want for breakfast let alone make a whole choice on who I want to try a “trial marriage” with. That’s a lot.

David goes on the first family dinner with Tara, her mom, Ms. Patricia and her friend Rachel. From the gate, Rachel comes with the tough questions like, “do you think you’re ready to settle down now?”

David: Definitely

Rachel: What’s the time frame?

Us:

Tara lays it all on the table and lets David know how much she likes him, and wants to be with him. I’m here for it. Let’s just hope David makes the choice in his best interest.

Vanessa meets Andre’s mom and sisters, and it’s an interesting night to say the least. Vanessa asks Ms. Judine if she has any hobbies or anything she likes to do for fun, and she says that she just works. Coming from a Caribbean family myself, this is the standard response, but I think it threw Vanessa off a little. Overall, the date went well, and Vanessa and Dre’s chemistry is so apparent that it gives me butterflies.

David meets Isabella’s family next, and they go out to dinner. Her brother asks about his plans for starting a family, and while Dave knows good and well he wants to become a parent soon, he says that he would be willing to wait until Isabella is ready. When David walks away from the table, Isabella’s parents encourages her to ask about his connection to the other girls, in particular Melika. David assures her that she’s got his primary focus and that he really does feel strongly for her.

The rest of us:

Do you tell every woman this?

Vanessa meets Myles family next. His mom and sister are super eclectic, just like he is, and it’s so cute. They seem to really like Vanessa, but then Myles sister asks something about biracial babies.

*Crickets*.

Well, I mean clearly the child would be from two different backgrounds if they were to get together, but it’s happened before, sis. It’s ok.

Okay… moving along. Finally, David meets up with Melika for dinner, which her parents refused to come to,  so she brought her best male friend Cyril along. Now to me, that would scream red flag, but we all know David can’t see a red flag even if he was the one waving it himself. I decided from the beginning of this episode that I would no longer be overly concerned about Melika or become too invested in her and David’s relationship. Her friend starts to ask the questions that I hope will allow Dave to see that they’re just not on the same page. Cyril is hip to the game and basically says what everyone is thinking: It’s not going to work.

The last meeting is with Shannon’s family, where Vanessa gets to see him in his natural element. After this dinner, I think she started to understand more of where he gets his silly side from. His mom and two sisters seem to be really protective of him, but will this perspective help move Shannon up to the top of her list?  I like Shannon, but I’m unsure if he would make a good match for Vanessa, as their personalities might be a little too different.

So when it was time to make a decision about 1 to cut, and 2 to “marry,” I will admit that I was conflicted. With Vanessa’s choices, obvi, not by David’s but we’ll get to that in a minute. I was pouring up the wine like it was going out of style. The fact is, that Myles and Dre were at the top of my list for a few weeks now, but I’m starting to see Shannon’s genuineness come out.

Me when she showed up at Dre’s house:
 

I was so upset, until I realized that she wanted him to be a trial husband.

*Sighs of relief*

 Thank goodness. That means that Myles and Shannon are potentially on the chopping block. My guess? Shannon. Not enough pull.

David shows up at Melika’s door, and I am praying and hoping and wishing that it’s because he’s decided to let her go.

But alas, it’s David so who am I kidding? He asks her to be his trial wife, and Melika says she can’t. Surprise Surprise.

David: But I love you.

Us:

David, Oh no baby, what is you doing??

I have lost the words to describe how frustrated I've become with David.  All the experts agree that he has a tendency to chase women, and Melika has made it obvious that she doesn’t want to be caught.

Sigh. I’m hoping this is the rejection that he needs to finally let her go.

All I know is??

We’ll see what this means for next week. Girl. 

 

MAFS: Second Chances-Episode 8: The Final Four

Shit just got real. Ok, so how many of us were at the edge of our seats during last night's episode? *raises hand* Let’s start with the breakups.

I wasn’t exactly sure who David was going to break up with, and I couldn’t quite say that anyone stood out over the other, but when he showed up at Misha’s door? I’d honestly say that I was surprised. And poor Misha looked really hurt. I think it may have had something to do with her telling him that Melika might not be here for the right reasons, because we all know how David reacts when someone says something bad (even if it’s true) about someone that he likes. *insert eye roll*

David pretty much tells her that the spark is fading, that they should go their separate ways, and I’m mildly annoyed. David would have had the opportunity to build with Misha if he wasn’t spending so much time on Melika, but that’s neither here nor there—the deed is done.

Vanessa breaks up with Chris.

Us: 

Thank the good Lord. Since the beginning of the season, I have been shouting and throwing things at my T.V. in hopes that Vanessa sends this young man home. I couldn’t deal with his basic ass vocabulary and him insisting during his self-recorded sessions that he was “the best man for her.”  Sir, please go and play with your Legos or action figures, because you are a child. I know he was hurt, but I’m so glad Vanessa decided to look past the fact that she was physically attracted to him and see that he’s not yet ready to be in a relationship with her.

And then there were 4.

On David’s group date at a painting class, he asks the girls how they’re feeling and talks to them about their experiences. Isabella discusses the fact that her ex boyfriends letter still bothers her, and starts to makes her a little hesitant about another relationship. At the same time, she’s trying to move forward and not let it get in the way of her and David’s relationship. We all know how tricky ex’s can be. One day you’re minding your ownbusiness- skin flourishing, hair growing, drinking water, doing squats and eating your vegetables, and the next thing you know, he’s in your inbox talking about “hey stranger.”
 

On Vanessa’s group bowling date, she also discusses with the guys how they’re feeling, and it’s obvious that they’re all nervous now that it’s down to such a small group. Shannon gets pulled aside because Vanessa feels like he’s been able to somewhat make his way back up to the top of her list although it was a struggle. Our boy Shannon is definitely super confident—cocky even—but it’s clear that he really does like Vanessa.

Pastor Calvin meets with Vanessa and David to talk with them about their choices and making the best decisions for themselves. He asks David what he thinks his greatest barrier is when it comes to finding love. David responds that he feels like he has a fear of losing it once he actually does find it and as a result, he ends up holding on too tight, driving the person away. Pastor Calvin reminds him that the people who wants to be there will stay. Anyone else? Let them go.

Yes! That’ll preach!

Then he tells Dave the secret to relationships is learning how to manage the like, and the spark. Who was taking notes? *raises hand* Pastor Cal got the juice!

When he speaks with Vanessa, they discuss her options, making sure that she’s giving everyone a fair chance so that she also makes the best decision. She tells Pastor Calvin about the two strongest contenders, Myles and Andre, and what she also likes about Shannon and Zach. Pastor Calvin tell both David and Vanessa that at this pivotal point, they need to have some more support in their corners, and their friends, who were there at the beginning of this process, will now come back to have group dates with the remaining 4.

Me:

Salem was the first group date with David and his friends and they go ice skating. Afterward, they’re able to have some time to talk and his friends get to ask her questions about family, how the process has been, and where she is when it comes to David. Salem is one of favorites, don’t get me wrong. But just like his friends mentioned a romantic connection—I just don’t see it between her and David. She’s the only one he hasn’t kissed yet, and I could see them buying matching t-shirts and baking pies together more than anything else. On the other hand, friendship is the foundation of any relationship, so maybe it could work.

Kenya and Danielle, Vanessa’s sister and best friend from high school, respectively—meet with Myles first. They discuss where Myles’s head is at with regards to Vanessa.

Myles: I don’t go into a relationship thinking that it’s not going to be the last one.

Us:

Danielle brings up the fact that if they were to do something long term, he would have biracial children, and his response was that he doesn’t think race or religion is going to have anything to do with the way he raises his kids. That did not go over well with Vanessa’s crew.

Myles, boo. You have to understand the complexities between, race, religion and culture, homeboy. He saves face by saying that the foundation of a relationship is trust, communication, patience and compromise and that they would basically work together to figure it out.  

Whoooo, great answer.  *wipes sweat* Myles you almost lost me.  

The next date is with Zach—he and the girls go play tennis together, and they talk to him about what he thinks the best thing about Vanessa is. He feels like she is a strong woman who knows what she wants out of life. They agree that he definitely seems into her physically, and that he’s cute, but as Kenya said, “Cute can’t carry a relationship.”

*two snaps*

David’s next group date is with Isabella, who although is a great match for him, brings up her ex-boyfriend multiple times throughout the course of the evening with his friends. Maybe she was nervous, more than likely this letter that he wrote her reopened some old wounds—either way, sis that’s not to be taken likely. David has a strong emotional connection with Isabella, but has she completely moved on from her ex?  His friends are not so sure.

Shannon comes over to Danielle’s house for a one on, where they play a Pictionary like game, and talk, but once again his mouth/lack of seriousness seems to do nothing but get him in trouble. The girls do not seem to think that he is funny, cute, or serious and Kenya for one lets his ass have it.

Kenya: I think that you think, that you are THE  catch.

Oot! The forecast is rainy with a hint of shade. Shannon boo, you need to step it up.

It’s Tara’s turn, and y’all know that I’m on her team. I think she has Dave’s best interest at heart and his friends are able to see it. They ask her if she had to pick one person to leave, who would it be and she mentions Isabella—for the simple fact that she doesn’t know if what they both want out of life matches up. Tara says that her favorite thing about David is his optimism. Ours too, Tara. Ours too.

The last group date is with Andre and the girls, and I think he won them over. He was respectful, engaging and he made them laugh. He was able to point little things about Vanessa, like her nervous laugh and the way she smiles.

Us:

I’m so happy for them, and I feel like we should name it. Andre +Vanessa= Adressa? Yes!

#TeamAdressa

Finally, David meets with his friends and Melika, who hesitates when they ask what her favorite thing is about him. It takes Dave back to his first marriage where his then wife struggled to name 3 basic things that she liked about him. Melika eventually comes up with something, and says that she could see a future together, which makes David super excited. Meanwhile I’m just like:

She’s not the one, Dave. Bye.

Group dates: Check.

Meet the friends: Check.

The previews say that we’re meeting family next. Parental units and such.

Warm up your tea, lovelies. See you next week.
 

MAFS: Second Chances- Episode 7: No Half Steppin'

*Sips wine* Y’all. Multitasking is not my strong suit. I can barely walk and chew bubblegum, let alone date 5 people at the same time. I would absolutely definitely call someone, someone else’s name, or confuse their experience/conversation with another. I’m so proud of David and Vanessa for getting this far in the process without going absolutely insane.

Let’s get into it--

We were right about Vanessa’s elimination choice—David was super dry and unfortunately he had to go. Especially after he “jokes” about Vanessa putting in a good word for her sister… Sir, are you serious? Bye.

Shannon is back from Thailand now but honestly, I didn’t miss him. Although I’m rooting for him, I’m starting to see that he and Vanessa don’t necessarily have the natural chemistry that it takes to foster a long lasting relationship, and I think they’re starting to unwravel.

On their group date, Shannon gives her a T-shirt that looks like he got from Amazon.com and not actually from Asia, and I’m just looking at him, shaking my damn head. Bring her an elephant statue. Some native art. A damn seashell would have been appropriate. A t-shirt? Shannon you are about to be cancelled.

On David’s group date, he invites the ladies out to eat Korean bbq.  They’re talking and having a good time, and then out of the blue--- Maya shows up.

Yes, Maya. Remember her? The one who dumped David because she couldn’t take the stress. She showed up and I was like:

Baby girl—didn’t you voluntarily leave after telling David that you no longer wanted to be here and break his heart? She asked to speak to him privately and lets him know that she wants to come back. Now girl, not only are you running up on them on their group date and ambushing them, but where did you get this pink, mink/squirrel fur from? Is it ever even that cold in Atlanta?

Anyways, now our guy David is extraordinarily confused and the girls are extraordinarily pissed. Rightfully so. You can’t just dip out because the stress is too high and then decide randomly when things are flowers and butterflies that you’re ready to hop back on the gravy train. So Dave tells her that can’t give her an answer at the moment, but honestly, it’s a “no” for me dawg.

David and Vanessa both speak to Rachel the relationship expert, where they discuss the final 5. David talks to Rachel about how Maya is trying to Diddy Bop her way back into the competition and Rachel tells him to follow his heart but make decisions with himself in mind. She talks to Vanessa about the fact that she is the prize and she would need to make sure that the guys are working for her affection. Then she tells us some of the best advice that I’ve heard so far, in that it’s important to remember that No. One. Is. Perfect. That if perfection was a reality, there would be no love, and the point is to learn, grow and evolve with someone.

Can we get into this WORD?!

Vanessa has a one on one date with Zach where they go and get pedicures and he reveals that he hasn’t had one in about eight years.

*Clutches pearls* I’m sorry, what sir? What kind of dungeon have your feet escaped from? I don’t even want to know what your toes look like. But anyway, on this date, Zach seems less annoying. He seems to be making his way up to Vanessa’s good side after weeks of being a mystery-- they have good conversation, share a kiss and the date ends well.

David goes on a one on one date with Misha, who I like for him as well. They go segwaying, which I’ve always wanted to try but too afraid that I would bust my entire ass and fall backwards. On their date, Misha lets him know that Melika told her earlier in the process that she couldn’t see herself kissing David because she doesn’t think she would feel emotionally connected enough.

David brushes it off.

Him: I appreciate you bringing it to my attention. At the same time, I have to trust Melika and her intentions.

Us:

I know we can all see that Melika isn’t the best fit for David. Why he can’t see it?

David’s next one on one date is with Salem. Now as I said before, I think Salem is a sweet girl with lots of potential and a probably a large walk-in closet. However, I’m not sure that David is the right fit for her. She seems very interested, but I foresee the cultural differences being somewhat of an issue. I’m not saying it couldn’t work, I’m just saying it might be slightly difficult because I don’t know if they have anything in common outside of being two sane and nice people. I see him kinda being like her older brother/best friend.

Chris joins Vanessa on a wine tasting one on one date, and y’all already know how I feel about him. All he can talk about is how his feelings are becoming stronger and albeit, he’s coming out of his shell a little more, but I’m still not into him for our girl, V.

He called Chardonnay “clear..” You mean, white wine??? Lord. Moving on.

On Isabella and David’s one on one to the golf course, she lets him know that her ex has contacted her and sent her a letter.  I can appreciate the fact that she’s honest with him about what’s going on in her life, because she was under no obligation to let him know that piece of information. They are able to discuss being vulnerable and open with each other, and although it was a little uncomfortable for the both of them, I think it brought them closer. Awwwww. I’m so #TeamIsabella.

David invites Melika over to his apartment for some cozy time and pizza making, where they discuss their futures—he asked her if he can see them together and what that would look like and she said that she “couldn’t answer that.”

David: That’s a normal/perfect answer.

Me:

It’s not a normal answer. How, pray tell, have y’all been together for weeks, many of which she’s been at the top of your list getting the majority of the attention and she talking ‘bout “she doesn’t know…”  David, stop chasing this girl—She’s gonna break your heart.

Andre was invited to Vanessa's house where she cooked a Jamaican oxtail dish for him. Ok, so for those of y’all who don’t know, I’m half Jamaican and I’ve been taught how to cook oxtails.  They take HOURS to make. You have to boil them, and then simmer them for AT LEAST 4 hours in order for them to be tender and soft—not to mention season them from the day before so that that the spices can permeate the meat because it’s such a fatty part of the cow. Ain’t nobody making oxtails for someone they don’t like. My family can barely get an oxtail dinner out of me, and they're my FAMILY. The fact that Vanessa went out of her way to make this dish tells me, she likes him more than she’s letting on. Yesssssssss, sis!!!   #TeamDre

Vanessa and Myles have a one on one where Myles cooks for her, they share a cupcake, and it’s sooooo cute.  The toughest competition is between Myles and Dre at this point, and I’m happy to see Vanessa seemingly becoming open but I’m worried that when it comes down to the final two, she will be struggling to make the right choice.

It’s now time for David to decide if he’s going let Maya come back to the group.  Earlier, David met up with his mom to discuss that potential. She wants to know why the girls didn’t like Maya to begin with and he tells her it’s because they thought she was phony and mean.

David’s mom: If more than one woman is telling you that, then it’s probably true.

US: YES, MA! WE BEEN TRYNA TELL HIM!

David meets up with Maya and after a bunch of back and forth, it’s decided that he can’t let her come back, and risk losing the potential with the other girls.

Us:

Thankfully David seems to me making better choices, and I’m sooooo happy. It’s now time for breaking up. Honestly, I’m not sure who David is going to end it with, but a piece of me thinks It’s going to be Salem, although I’m hoping it's Melika. I feel like they don’t really connect on a deeper level and I can’t see her being his wife. I think Vanessa will eliminate Shannon, although I’m hoping it’s Chris. Shannon hasn’t stepped up to the plate enough and on their last one on one, Vanessa’s interest doesn’t seem all the way there.

Till next week, lovelies. Oh, the anticipation!

MAFS: Second Chances- Episode 6: WTF

Things have gotten very interesting. David and Vanessa are narrowing down the crew, but I’m gonna be honest—I don’t think they’re making some of the best decisions. Last week, David shocked us all when he broke up with Jordan, and from there I really started to question his choices.

It’s hard to watch, honestly. David is such a genuine person, but it’s almost as if he can’t make the best decisions for his own love life. He knows how he feels, but is he being led by the wrong things? It’s not that uncommon—we all do it, so I’m not here to judge.  But if David, as sweet as he is, wants to find his partner, he needs to understand what he should be looking for in her.

Ok. *steps off soapbox* Let’s begin with the breakups.

David knocks on Callie’s door and I’m not surprised, but I don’t think he gave her enough of a chance. Unfortunately, perception is reality and I think she ended up losing on that front. Last week I said she got caught up in being a mean girl and fluffed that apology-- but I’m inclined to think that she has a big heart and just a f**k it personality, that gets misunderstood frequently.

I can relate.

Vanessa breaks up with Ike. He’s an attractive man with nice qualities, but she couldn’t get into the fact that Ike wants to wait until marriage for sex. And while I understand the values he holds dear, I’m all about sampling the goods beforehand. The connection wasn’t strong enough to make Vanessa want to wait. So he had to go. Fair enough.

Let’s move on.

Vanessa meets with Dr. Pepper to discuss the connections she has with the guys. She let her know that David is someone who she thinks is mature with a good head on his shoulders, but needs him to open up more. Dr. P. tells Vanessa that because she has a firm foundation with the six guys left, it’s up to her to let them know that they can be vulnerable.

We skip over to our guy Dave who has had something interesting happen to him.  One of his friends sends him a text to let him know that her ex is dating Brittany.

 *sips tea*

Yes, that Brittany. Shorty who wore black leather boots and a sweater dress to the botanical garden date with David. I know that was a dig, but I’m feeling particularly petty today.  Y’all already know David was stressed. He meets with Dr. Pepper to talk to her about what he found out and I’m not sure how he went from saying that Brittany is “dating a friend’s ex” to “she has a boyfriend” but that's what's he labeled it as.  Granted the rules of this specific situation are that the girls are supposed to be here for him, but interestingly enough we already live in the kind of society where men can date whomever they want, but if a woman dates someone else, she’s automatically considered undateable. Tuh. 

Dammit. How does my soapbox keep ending up over here?

Anyway,  Dave takes the six girls on a group date to make BBQ sauce, and of course he’s going to have to address the “Brittany is in a whole entire relationship” situation. It’s very obvious that he’s tense and all the girls feel it. He decides to start the date by asking them if they’re dating anyone else.

They say no.

Me: 

Girl, I get why you wouldn’t admit it in front of the group, but lying is going to get you booted.

So as the date goes on, Dave is on edge, the girls are on edge, and my edges are on edge. You can literally cut the tension with knife. Dave goes around and tastes all the girl’s bbq sauce and then asks if “anyone wants to say anything?” Sir, you’re asking people if they want to confess that they’ve been hiding the fact that they’re dating other people and it’s becoming hella awkward. Stop the shenanigans and just pull Brittany aside. He selects Salem for their one on one date. I really like her—her makeup is ALWAYS on point and her outfits are super cute, plus she’s never really been mixed up in the drama. Cool points all around.

Dave decides to pull Melika aside to discuss the fact that Brittany has a boyfriend.

Us:

Seriously, dude?

Why would you tell her about another girl in the group? That’s his mistake right there and it’s not the first time he’s done it. Keep that to yourself. Write it down in your journal. Call your homeboy. But telling one girl that you’re dating about another girl is not how this works.

Needless to say, Brittany gets the boot. Dave talks to her outside about her lying, and then asks her to leave.

On Vanessa’s group date, she makes Cheesecake with the guys. Hell, EYE would want to be on this date if I knew there’d be cake! Afterwards, Vanessa pulls up a round table type conversation and brings up cheating… Again. I get that it’s a sore spot for her, but sis, you have to let it go.  The past is the past and both Dre and David—the only guys that admitted cheating-- aren’t those same guys anymore.


Chris is still here.

Why? I’m not sure. He’s a child, and he’s doing whatever he can to impress her. This isn’t about a double standard, but men normally mature slower than women, and he’s already barely legal.  Yes, he’s cute, but where is his head at? She takes him on a one on one, to a “fancy restaurant” he orders something he can’t pronounce, and they find out that it’s fried pigs feet. He’s pretending to like snail to “win her heart” and honestly, I just can’t see what our girl Vanessa sees in him.

This is stressing me.

On David and Dre’s small group date with Vanessa, they talk more about physical contact and the importance of sex in a relationship.  I’m proud of her for asking questions that would normally seem taboo, because we’re all adults here. She takes David on a one on one where they discuss him opening up more, having more emotion in his conversations, where he stands, and what their romantic chemistry is.

On David and Salem’s one on one, he learns that Salem hasn’t told her parents about dating him while he’s dating other women because it wouldn’t fly in her culture, and we see Dave become visibly annoyed. Honestly, he needs to relax, and understand that not everything will work on his time, and it’s not really fair to judge her on that. But Dave is also on edge because of everything that’s been happening so I get it, but I need him to pull it together.

David’s next private date is with Tara, and I actually really like them together. Since Jordan is no longer here, I’m now on #TeamTara because I like the fact that she’s mature and sweet and is a good match for him intellectually and personality wise. We’re rooting for you, girl!

On a second small group date with Myles, Chris, Zach and Zach’s shirt, Vanessa takes them to her old stomping grounds/ Alma Mater, Clark Atlanta University (One time for #HBCU love) and has them put on a talent show. Zach does this Love Jones-esque poetry, Myles sings and Chris just takes his shirt off and dances (I’m over him,) but she chooses Zach.

They discuss his careers, traveling, what his future looks like and what his main source of income is. He tells her that it’s acting, and all I hear is.
 

Finally, David’s small group is a bowling date where although he gets a chance to speak to Misha and interact with Salem, he still chooses Melika for the private date where they go shoot some pool.

Melika then randomly tells him that she doesn’t think they have nothing in common.


Us:

WE’VE KNOWN THIS!!!!
WE’VE BEEN KNOWN THIS!
We’ve been shouting at the TV for weeks now!

*woosah… rubs temples*

David, you have to get rid of her.

Breakup time--- Dave sent Brittany home earlier in the week so he doesn’t have to choose anyone else to stop dating, but he’s already been going through it.  I think Vanessa is going to send Zach home because he has no coins, or David home because he’s as dry as the end of a Popeye’s biscuit.

Let me just say—this has probably been the most frustrating episode to watch to date, and my soapbox has been put to good use. 

Friends-- see y’all next week.

MAFS: Second Chances-Episode 5: The Nitty Gritty

The competition is heating up. We find out that the second person that Vanessa breaks up with is Howard. Howard… was kinda like wallpaper, orrrrrrrr, like a  China cabinet. Present in the room, but you don't really notice that he's there. Nice enough guy, but nothing about him really stood out, so I’m not too broken up about it. Meh. 

Last week, we didn’t know who David was going to end it with. Maya had already tapped herself out, so he only had to break up with one person. He knocks on the door, and Jordan opens it.

Us: 

I’ve BEEN on #TeamJordan.  I think they would've made a great couple and the fact they were almost matched on the original show says a lot. She balances him and compliments his sensitivity, but wouldn’t overwhelm him in a marriage like I think some of the other girls would. They sit and have a conversation about the fact that their relationship hadn't really grown and that she had some negative things to say about the other girls--particularly Melika. The fact is, that David asked her to spill the tea and then got caught up on that instead. Jordan laid it all on the table.

Jordan: Do you feel like you even got to know me? You don’t know what I even do for work.

Us:

Boom.

David the People Pleaser cannot win. Jordan was right. He spent so much time trying to find out who was involved in the drama, that he neglected to get to know her. Pastor Calvin called it. David is so used to chasing women and trying to “fix” the ones with the issues, that he will literally forget about the potential in others.

We see the conversation end with both Jordan and David in tears. My. heart. broke.

Vanessa meets with relationship expert Rachel Dealto to discuss her feelings about the seven suiters she has left. They discuss her non-negotiables-- goal-less immature men who have nothing going for themselves. Rachel reminds her to open up, as she hasn’t kissed Dre yet— and she needs to make sure she’s not too guarded.

Rachel asks Dave about his deal-breakers also.  He wants a family, so she encourages him to have those conversations with the girls sooner rather than later. Get to the core of who these women are and make sure the chemistry and connection is actually there.

On the group date, Dave takes the seven girls to a trampoline park. Taking Isabella aside, they start to have a conversation about their futures. Isabella, although on the younger side, was one of my favorite picks for him. She lets him know that she’s always wanted to teach abroad and David admits he’s only been to Canada. Sir, I’m going to need you to get more stamps on your passport becauussseeeeee you’re 31.

Callie approaches the girls and apologizes to them about the name calling and the gossiping. Later on, David and Melika have a moment in the foam pit where she reports to Dave that while Callie did say she was sorry, she still thinks that she's full of shit. Although I don’t care for Melika, she makes a good point. Callie played a little dirty, got caught up and is currently trying to save face.

So when David pulled Callie aside to discuss what her intentions were, how she was feeling and then asks her on the one on one date, all the girls, are like,

They go horseback riding and I’d say they had a decent time, but I’m not so sure the spark they once had is going to be reignited. Callie is definitely on the chopping block. 

Vanessa takes her seven guys to play flag football, complete with custom made #TeamVanessa shirts that I thought were super cute.

Myles whips out the charm once again, and she ends up asking him on a second one on one date. I think we’re all starting to see a connection grow but all the other guys are looking like:

On their date they participate in an African dancing class. Now, we all know that this is the first White dude that Vanessa has dated, and I knew it would be interesting, but when Myles started dancing...

I mean at least he tried.  The attempt was attractive and the heartfelt kiss at the end told me that Vanessa is really starting to fall for him. She wants a sweet guy who is all about her, and Myles is definitely that. 

On the next small group date, Vanessa takes her top runners, Dre and Myles on a out to a cornfield and Myles—bless his heart—said they went to a “Worldly” Dance Class the day before. 

Myles. Boo. It’s ok to say African. Poor thing.

So on this date, it’s much more intimate with just the three of them. They get to talk about family/upbringing and it’s discovered that like Vanessa, Dre was also raised by a single mother. Vanessa chooses Dre to go off on a one on one date, and Myles looks crushed.

They walk over to this really cute picnic and start chatting. Dre is showering her with compliments, and they finally kiss.

Y'all know Dre has been my top pick for Vanessa from the beginning. I thought their energies and personalities matched the best so I’m happy this finally happened.

They do have a conversation though, about his past relationships and he’s admitted that he’s cheated before, which to Vanessa raises a red flag because she, like most of us, have trust issues. Oh Dre. I wanted you to win. 

For David’s small group date, he takes Misha, Tara and Melika to an apple orchard/farm because as we know, a spontaneous attitude in his partner is a non-negotiable. They watch a pig race, and all of the girls seem to be having a great time except Melika. I mean, honestly I don’t particularly care for the pig situation, either, so I feel her. But, sis.  You have to know what kind of man you’re dealing with. These are the things he likes. Knowing David’s personality by now, we know that he will probably try to accommodate her, but end up miserable in the process.  Don’t do it. Dave.

They move on from pig racing to milking cows. Now,  I’ll be honest. I’m from Brooklyn. There are no cows here. Just rats, pigeons and bodega cats. However, as long as the cow isn’t giving me the side eye, I’d pull on one of the little udder things really quick, and jump back-- you know-- just to say I did. If my man likes milking cows, well so do I.  Melika wasn’t having it. She participated, but it was clear that she was over it and starts to complain.

Girl.

Of course David is trying to be Captain Save- A-Heaux and I’m over it. I feel like Melika is turning into a Maya part 2--trying to manipulate him into doing what she wants him to do, instead of focusing on what’s best for him. We see you.

Vanessa finally goes on a one on one date with Ike. Now Ike seems like an all-around regular shmegular guy-- really straight forward with a good head on his shoulders. Vanessa is religious and so is he, and that foundation is really important to her. They have a conversation over ice cream about relationships and communication. 

Ike: There’s no conflict that can’t be solved if two people are willing to really work.

Us:

Ok Ike!! Let me find out you got the juice!!

Vanessa asks him what his views were on sex before marriage.

Ike: *awkward pause*

Vanessa: Are you a virgin?

Ike: Ummm.

Us:

Oh Ike. Waiting until marriage is a nice but… honey… I don’t know about all that.

Isabella and David go on another one on one, where we learn that Isabella might not be as ready as David is to settle down. The overseas conversation comes up again and while she wants to get married, having kids isn’t an immediate thing for her, which might be a bit problematic for David. She’s only 23 and Dave is 31. Timing is everything. Yikes. This may not work.

Zach goes on a final one on one date with Vanessa where they discuss the fact that she didn’t really get to know him because she’s not really sure who he is. Sidebar: shout out to that “Feminist AF” sweatshirt our girl is wearing. I love it!

The date goes ok, but I don’t think Zach is going to make it to the end. There’s too many mysteries with him.

On the last one on one date with Melika, David is pouring his heart out to her and I just feel like she is not reciprocating. She’s dry and I think she’s starting to realize how serious he is. Girl just pack up and go. You don’t love that man. Nor do you deserve him.

It’s cutting time. I don’t think Callie and Zach are going to make it. My twitter feed seems to think Ike is on the chopping block because of the whole chastity thing, which is likely a no go for Vanessa. Gotta try the fruit before you buy it.

Who’s it going to be? *Whispers* Melika. Dave.. Pssst. Send Melika home.   I guess we’ll see.

MAFS: Second Chances- Episode 2: Parties & Potential

We left off last week with Vanessa and David giving the boot to half of the 50 singles, eliminating people they had no connection with, or didn’t fit well with their personalities. We also left David facing a very difficult situation as Jennifer legit begged him to give her a second chance. (See what I did there?) David—bless his heart, looked extremely stressed, and if I were him, I would have likely taken off running. But he decides --against his better judgment I’m sure, to let her to stay.

Jennifer: David, you won’t regret it.

The rest of us:

The singles both host pool and cocktail parties, without their friends this time, to get to know their remaining 25 dates. By the end of the night, they’ll have to narrow their pool further to just 10, who they’ll continue to get to know on a deeper level. Before the day’s events, they both meet with expert Dr. Pepper Schwartz, (I’m too tickled every time I hear her name) to prepare. In Vanessa’s meeting, she admits that she’s instantly physically attracted to some over others. We know that she’s talking about Chris, but he’s barely an adult and his rapping/ monologue/poem thing was less than amusing.

Dr. Pepper suggests that it’s really important for Vanessa to look below the surface for who she can connect with, and who also seems interested in her. She advises her to pay attention to who asks her lots of questions and be mindful of each guys’ “good nature”. i.e.; who is not—and more importantly who is acting a damn fool.

Dave’s meeting goes a bit differently. He confesses that he saw one of his dates—Merrill, out and about with another guy and it rubbed him the wrong way. He also asks Dr. Pepper, what he should do if he feels like the mood is right and he’s compelled to kiss one of the girls.

*record scratch*

Dr. P’s face says it all. She tells David that it’s a bit too early, and it could change the game drastically. I agreed. Pump your brakes, Kemosabe. We know you love hard, boo, but you have to take your time.

At Vanessa’s pool party, the guys—some shirtless—some not, begin to walk in.

Me:

They are flexing. Andre, who is becoming one of my favorites, shows off his tattoos, which are significant and sentimental.  Zach, who resembles my favorite green eyed heartthrob, Michael Ealy, takes initiative and pulls Vanessa to the side to have a conversation with her.

Antonio saw that as rude of him, becomes a bit jealous and attempts to interrupt, but Vanessa remains poised and insists on finishing.
Whispers: *Hey Tony, I don’t think that was good nature*

Meanwhile at Dave’s pool party, Jennifer puts those damn angel wings back on. It was what she was wearing when they first met, so I guess this is what she calls stepping her game up? I call it doing the damn most. Tomato, tomato.

She also tries to pull David aside to find out why she got cut in the first place. I didn’t think that was something she should ask, but I mean, it’s valid. The way I look at it? Sometimes you got the juice, and well, sis-- sometimes you don’t. She says she felt a connection, but I’m starting to think that it might actually be gas or something. David said he would talk to her later, which made sense given the environment.  She then comments that she noticed he’s wearing the same swimming shorts from his honeymoon. 

Me: And David. And everyone watching:

We have one word for you, D.

Run.

Back at Vanessa’s party, I’m sensing more of a connection between her and Andre. He asks great questions and seems really engaged. They talked about a bunch of topics including one of my favorite things to discuss-- love languages. Ok, friends! I see y’all! I’m liking this.

It’s also becoming easier for Vanessa to weed some people out.

Barrett is a lot. And he’s rude.

During a talk with Matthew, he says that from what he’s seen about marriages he “wouldn’t want to be in one.” Sir. You DO realize that the show is called MARRIED at first sight, right? Oh boy.

By the time of David’s cocktail party that evening, we figure out that the majority of the girls don’t really like Maya. They feel like she’s drier than burnt toast and that she’s “acting” when David comes around. The claws are officially out.  Her and Callie, are the main ones bumping heads, and seem to be literally seconds away from trying to drown each other in the pool.

Merrill shows up late, missing the pool party entirely, and Dave is completely over it, promptly addressing the fact that he saw her out with another guy, which--- I mean, is understandable for him to be upset, but I didn’t think was a huge deal. Nonetheless, Dave doesn’t feel like she’s all in and asks her to leave.

I wasn’t expecting that.

She starts crying and sweating and I feel really bad for her, but girl go home before your makeup stains your cute dress.

Callie was on the prowl and found Dave alone. They played pool and she ends up making—and winning-- a bet of a kiss from him if she made a shot in before he did.

Tara, who I also like, and David have history. They moved to Atlanta around the same time, but never got a chance to date each other, so I think it’s really cute that the stars may be aligning this time around, and I’m happy that they got a chance to chat.

Fast forward, David takes Maya into the house to talk to her about the issues she’s having with the other girls.  She feels like she’s being bullied and attacked.  She’s flustered, and the conversations ends with a kiss.

Us: Yelling at the T.V. because he’s doing EXACTLY opposite of what Dr. Pepper advised.

At Vanessa’s cocktail party, she’s able to speak to Nathan again, who seems more genuine than last time. He explains to Vanessa that he became a police officer because he likes to help people and she seems taken to that.

Vanessa also asks our homeboy Dre how he would feel if---hypothetically speaking---she asked him to cut his hair. Not the blonde quiff, sis! It’s his signature!  

I’m a little distracted by James, the fellas nicknamed him “Deebo” and his velvet shirt.  Baby, it’s at least 80 degrees even when the sun sets in Georgia on a good night, and you wore the hottest fabric known to man.

Well, it’s time to cut.  Vanessa and David each shake hands with the singles and ask the ones they’re not continuing with to meet them inside. This is the worst part of course, but Vanessa cuts her 15, seamlessly. David? Sigh. He asks the girls to meet him inside—including Jennifer, again—and home girl has an entire meltdown. Once again, begins begging him not to send her home. And once she gets inside, she starts cursing and carrying on. The other girls, graciously accept their dismissal, but Jen is lamenting over David’s so called, “bad decisions.” Last week, we were shocked at her reaction. This time?
 

Go home and do some yoga and rebalance your chakras, beloved because something ain’t right. Whew. Glad that’s over.  It’s down to 10 each and now the real fun begins. Vanessa. David. I hope you’re ready.